I love opening the fridge and seeing leftover steak because that means beef for breakfast!
Jacob was home for breakfast yesterday and I asked him if he wanted a breakfast sammie too – he never says no if I offer to make him food. He ate his breakfast and said “you are the only person I know who just won’t eat a bowl of cereal for breakfast. So true – and for the record, lettuce on a breakfast sammie is delicious – just a bit of extra crunch. The English muffin is 3, the egg/egg white is 2, the 1/2 ounce cheese is 2 and 1.5 ounces of steak is only 1 – so 8 points total.
I had planned on taking a long walk between the rain yesterday, but just as I was about to go, I checked my blood sugar and it was 134 – too low to walk because my blood sugar would drop too much. So I decided to skip the insulin at lunch and go to the gym in the afternoon. Still haven’t been to the grocery store yet, so I spun the refrigerator wheel for lunch. I had leftover pulled pork, which reminded me of coleslaw, and I suddenly realized I had everything to make a slaw to go with the pork. I hate mayo based slaws though – I am a vinegar girl through and through. I think that’s why I love my Aunt Martha’s pork bbq so much – it’s east Carolina slaw that my grandpa used to make with Tabasco, crushed red pepper and copious amounts of vinegar.
When I went to a foodie event last December, one of the vendors was Co-op Sauce, where I bought a poblano mustard.
You could actually substitute any mustard you like, but I like the extra kick of this one in this slaw.
- 2 tablespoons poblano mustard
- 2 tablespoons apple cider vinegar
- 1 teaspoon garlic
- 2 tablespoons light agave necar
- 1 tablespoon grapeseed oil
Mix everything together and store in a mason jar.
For my lunch, I cut 1/2 cup of red cabbage, shredded one small carrot and two small radishes, and tossed in 1 tablespoon of that vinaigrette above. I called that 6 servings for 2 points each, but ended up using only half of the slaw on my tostadas for 1 point.
I reheated the 3 ounces of the pork and then tossed it in Stubb’s Texas sriracha bbq sauce – so there was a TON of flavor on that plate. Crunchy, spicy and well – porky! The best combo ever and only 8 smart points.
Finally my blood sugar was high enough to go to the gym. I ended up doing an hour on the treadmill at 3.5 mph at 8% incline – it helps if you watch a whole episode of property brothers to make the time fly by.
I decided not to go to WW this morning. I’ve done some emotional eating since Hannah and I had our talk – I love that she opened up to me, but Tony has been on my mind a lot lately. I keep thinking of things I should have said or done, and thinking about the future we never got to share. I’ve cried. But I think it’s a good thing – I need to get past my loss so that I can move forward, and I think every day I wake up, it’s a step in the right direction.
It’s one of the reasons I made fried rice for dinner, so that I could watch the video of him making it so I remember how he made it. I loved hearing his voice again. But, I did change his recipe up just a tiny bit – I used leftover grilled chicken and threw that in at the end, and I subbed in Ponzu sauce for the soy sauce. I ended up using a bag of broccoli slaw that I found in the fridge for my veggies, so this literally came together in about 5 minutes.
I found it ironic that I used the same bowl to plate my dinner as Tony did in the video. You guys, I have about 80 bowls to choose from, so I thought that was interesting! All I know is that I still miss him a lot. Our marriage wasn’t perfect by any stretch of the imagination, and if I am being truthful, he was difficult to live with at times because he always thought he was right. But in loss, all the good things I remember about him rise to the top. And there are a lot of great memories to choose from – so I have to hold on to those memories.
I just have to remind myself that eating shit isn’t going to make me feel better or bring him back. So here’s to a new week (on Thursday!) of no emotional eating. I am challenging myself to 7 days of mindful eating – here’s to a new week!