Another whirlwind weekend is in the books.  I don’t know if it’s just the time of year, but the days keep going by so fast. 

Friday was my office luncheon, and I am usually in charge of the menu, location, etc.  So I always have a touch of nervousness when the day of the event comes around  because I want to make sure that I have remembered everything.  Well, any nervousness I had going into the event was alleviated when I met Gina and Stephanie our server at DB Steakhouse in Schaumburg.  They both did an amazing job – my only disappointment is that I asked for appetizers to come out at 2:15 and it was closer to 3:00 p.m., but other than that, it was a success.  Whew!  The food was delicious, the steak was great, and look at how cute my personalized menus I made turned out!  And the best part about being in charge is that since I was at the venue first, and got the first glass of wine.

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Jacob and I really want to go to David Burke’s Prime House in Chicago.  They dry age their beef in a Himalayan sea salt room so that as the beef ages, it absorbs all that wonderful salty air. 

After that I was meeting up with my friend Alison.  She had some of her brothers amazeball sauerkraut to give me, and in exchange, I brought her and her family my buffalo chicken chili for dinner.  #winwin!

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Their girls are adorable.  The oldest one is 7 going on 17.  The baby reminds me so much of Hannah.  Her lack of hair, her even disposition and the fact that she doesn’t mind sitting on my lap.  I’ve offered to watch their girls next Saturday night so they can get some adult time.   I hope to make sugar cookies, and find some fun places to take them around town for the holidays. 

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Saturday I got bizzy in my kitchen, but I had someplace to go that afternoon.  One of my high school friends son committed suicide a month ago.  He was only 18.  Saturday would have been his 19th birthday so they had a celebration of life for him. 

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It was a wonderful event, given the circumstances.  Charlie’s favorite color was green so after the parents talked, their clergyman started talking.  He asked those in attendance to think back to the most amazing birthday you ever had.  Was it a concert?  Was it a vacation or just something simple like a family dinner.  He said that any best birthday pales in comparison to the birthday you’d have in heaven.  And while I am not an overly religious person, it brought me a sense of peace as I go into the second Christmas without Tony.

After the talk everyone stood around the baselines  of the high school baseball field where Charlie excelled.  His parents and brothers stood at the pitchers mound.  We sang happy birthday to him and released the balloons.

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And while I know what it’s like to lose a husband, I cannot even fathom losing a child, no matter what the circumstance. 

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Last years Christmas was a  complete blur, and if I didn’t have my blog to look back on, I probably wouldn’t have remembered a thing.  But this year?  I have a renewed purpose.  I came home from the ball park and pulled out my ornaments and some of my snowmen.  I was home alone and just listened to Christmas music and enjoyed the few hours of solitude.

PicMonkey Collage - tree

I love how simple, yet pretty the living room looks.  I lit the candles and when I settled down to watch t.v. for the evening Saturday night, I was truly happy.  And while I’d give anything to have  Tony back, I’ve realized that my purpose for being put on this earth was to take care of him through his illnesses, and now that time has passed, it’s time to figure out what the next chapter of my life is.  And I am perfectly okay with that.

I saw this on Instagram, and it totally capsulated my thoughts on where I am in my life right now:

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I love the last line the best, “when you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you.”   I couldn’t have said it better myself.  Now go make it a great day!