35 days ago yesterday, I was determined to be “back on!” and I zeroed out my Zero scale and decided it was a fresh start.   Well that was when Tony went to the hospital and I never would have guessed 36 days later I would be a widow.   My Aunt and I were talking and our cousin, when she became a widow, said that word didn’t fit her because she was young and not 85 years old all dressed in black.  Some of those days were a blur to me – I know I’ll go back and read my blog when the time comes, but let’s just say eating and exercising were the furthest things from my mind.  I ate hospital food.  I ate pizza and pasta.  I grabbed McDonald’s when I could.  Not sure a vegetable passed my lips other than a French fry, so pretty sure that doesn’t count as a veggie serving.

But yesterday I stepped on the scale.  Seriously you thought I would see +8 on the scale, but was shocked to see this:

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But then I thought about it.  I did a lot of grazing eating, and while it may have seemed to me that I was eating a lot, maybe I wasn’t?  All I know is that it’s a Christmas Miracle that I maintained my weight through losing Tony.

I used some of my Starbuck’s gift card money and got a protein box, and somehow my mouth said “and I’ll have a baby vanilla scone!”  I love this plate.

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I went to the gym at lunch.  My gym sent me a condolence card, which I thought was nice.  I only told one of the gym members about Tony because he always asked how he was doing.  At one time he was going to try to help Tony find a job, but I kept telling him that Tony wasn’t healthy enough yet, and he always said “when he’s healthy you let me know, okay?!”  I saw him last week after not seeing him for a couple weeks and he stopped his run and asked about Tony.  I simply said “he passed away” and before I could say anything else, I started to cry, then he started to cry and he jumped off the treadmill and gave me a big hug.  He said “If you need anything, help around the house, something is broken, you let me know, okay?”  So sweet.

I decided I still had plenty of food in the house to get me through the week.  I ended up making what I am calling a tex-mex chicken and rice soup.  After this picture was taken I added a bit more broth, the rice was stingy and soaked it all up!   I love the edamame in this soup.

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And so it begins with office treats – they are starting to come in on a daily basis now, but I am happy to say, I haven’t eaten a single office treat this year.  And there is toffee in that basket!

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After work I had to pick up a couple small gifts so I stopped by Tuesday Morning.  I am kicking myself for not buying this yesterday because you know how that store goes – if you see it, and want it, buy it because it probably won’t be there the next time you go.   I think this would be cute in a kitchen or dining room.

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And I came home to more loot love!  Blog reader and Instagram follower Bonnie sent me a Sur La Table gift card – you know I will put that to good use – thanks Bonnie!

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Blog reader Michelle (MB) sent me a Starbucks gift card and some money for whatever I want to use it for – MB, if that fork piece above is still there today, I am going to use the money to buy it – then it will only cost me $20!

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And blog reader Amie sent me a gorgeous charm bracelet!  OMG, when I read the charm I cried you guys – it says “half my heart is in heaven.”  She said that sapphire is Tony’s birthstone and she knows that blue is my favorite color.  I love it!!

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Heather, you’ll be happy to know that I used the spiralizer you gave me for the first time, and well, just like you, I don’t really get it.  The picture on the box shows these gorgeous strands of zucchini, but all I got was small strands and then ended up with a pointy zucchini and I tried working it several ways, but never got the results I wanted.  I’ll need to see if there is a youtube demonstration on this!

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I bought a New York strip over the weekend with blog reader Liz’s Fresh Market gift card.  I just let the steak come to room temperature and simply put cracked black pepper and salt flakes on the steak.  Since this was a thicker steak, I did 3x3x2x2 – three minutes the first two sides, and then two minutes the second two sides.  I sauteed the zucchini ribbons in a bit of butter, salt and pepper and made salt and pepper potato chips on the side.  I think this is the first meal I’ve made at home for myself since Tony passed away.

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Perfect medium rare!  I only ate half the steak, and plan on making a steak and egg burrito with part of the leftover steak this morning for breakfast.  So good.

Oh, and yesterday I talked about my friend Dana a.k.a The Kitchen Witch’s favorite post of mine, but had a senior moment and forgot to put in the link.  She’s an amazing writer, but this piece always stuck with me.  Go check it out for me, okay?  Dana, I just realized I’ve “known” you since 2009 – so crazy!

Alright, I literally have about 8 minutes to get dressed and out the door.  I am not sleeping well these last couple weeks and I may have slept in until 7:30 this morning, and I have to leave my house at 8:05! 

Make it a great day!