Several of you have guessed that Tony isn’t doing too well these last few weeks. I’ve hinted about his loss of appetite, doesn’t like the smell of food, being tired all the time. Over last weekend we could both tell that things weren’t quite right. While we know he has congestive heart failure and liver problems, those were being closely monitored through weekly blood tests and medications were adjusted accordingly.
I suddenly realized on Friday night that I got home around 5:30. Tony was in his favorite chair. We watched t.v., I ate dinner in the back family room. I cleaned the kitchen, threw a load of laundry in. We caught up on some shows on the DVR. It wasn’t until we were ready to go to bed on Friday night that I realized in 6 1/2 hours Tony never got up to go to the bathroom. Huh.
Saturday I had my cleaning pants on and was busy doing chores around the house. He doesn’t sleep well over night, so he pretty much cat napped most of the day. When I heard him start to slightly snore, I’d move onto computer projects so I wouldn’t wake him. Um, I may have deleted nearly 2,000 unnecessary pictures off of the computer! Sunday is his big football day and my big cooking day! I seriously look forward to this day more than any other. Tony is doing what he loves, and I spend all day in the kitchen. I try to take as many food pictures for my blog for the upcoming week while I have daylight. I made a breakfast pizza for my brunch on Sunday. All of a sudden Tony says “what’s that awful smell?!” My first reaction was “my amazeball breakfast pizza!”
But then I realized the smell of food was making him feel nauseous, and just like that at 11:00 a.m. with a full Sunday ahead of me, my kitchen was closed. I will not sugar coat this – I wanted to cry. Cooking is not only my hobby, but it is my stress reliever. Ever start kneading dough and get lost in the feel of the dough and all the thoughts that are bombarding your mind somehow melt away? That’s what happens to me. It’s my comfort zone.
But I had to take a step back, realize I have to put my feet in Tony’s shoes, and I quickly turned my attitude around. I realized Sunday that Tony sat in his chair from 10:00 a.m. on Sunday until we went to bed at 11:00 p.m. and never moved.
Monday morning I got up. I was all pumped because I was all prepared – my clothes were laid out, my food was packed, my gym clothes were ready to go. Since I had so much time on the computer Sunday I wrote my Monday post the night before and had planned on getting in a brisk 40 minute walk before work. But I woke up, looked at Tony and we both quickly realized that this was out of our hands and we needed to go to the hospital.
So the post I wrote on Monday was kind of a lie. Yes, I did eat that food – but the salad I said from Mariano’s was from the hospital cafeteria. Tony didn’t want to worry his parents or his son until we knew what was really wrong. For all we knew maybe it would just be an adjustment of medications and we would be sent home. We got to the ER at 7:15, but didn’t get assigned a room until after 3 p.m. Our GP was taking full control of the situation, which I appreciated. Turns out Tony’s red blood count was low, we have his existing liver and heart problems, and now we throw in kidney problems on top of that. We now have 5 doctors on his medical “team” to figure out the solution of his now new problem – kidney failure.
So I have used up all my time off at work, and on Monday even went over by about 4 hours. So Tuesday and yesterday I had to go into the hospital 90 minutes before I went to work, and after work I’d spend about 4 hours. I usually have better luck on being there for doctors rounds in the morning, so yesterday morning I got to the hospital at 6:20 and didn’t leave until 8:15, and didn’t see a single one. All we knew was that the day before dialysis may be on the table. Yesterday morning during the nurse shift change, the overnight nurse tells the day nurse “so Jeff is just waiting on getting a shunt put in for dialysis later today.” We were both like “huh?!” Apparently his blood work numbers overnight made our kidney doctor order the dialysis. News to us, but I guess we’ll roll with it.
I have to leave for work not too long after that conversation. I had a Chobani flip that I got at the store a week before last for .99 – score! Only check out the expiration date! I didn’t care – it was close enough that I ate it, on the side I had my microwave egg white/spinach/ham/cheese omelet.
Later in the morning Tony texts me – I give you another episode of Texting with Tony!
I am glad he’s able to keep some sense of humor throughout this whole week. We had a nurse from Indiana on Monday, and when they did the shift change, the Indiana nurse left to grab something and when she came back, Tony said to the new nurse “I can’t believe you think all people from Indiana are dumb!” This nurse turned several shades of red until she finally realized Tony’s sense of humor.
I went to the gym at lunch – and nearly two miles into my treadmill walk/run Tony texts me and says our GP is calling me. So I think “now, in a half hour?!” I jumped off the treadmill, grabbed some paper and a pen in case he called and walked around the gym until it was time to head back to work. No call ever came. I dragged my cell phone, a pen and a piece of paper everywhere I went yesterday. To the bathroom, to fill up my cup of coffee, to the kitchen to heat up my lunch. My lunch was chicken tortilla soup that I had in the freezer – which I doctored up with some Frank’s hot sauce. You know I can put that shit on anything.
I ended up swinging by Jimmy John’s on the way back to the hospital since it’s right across the street from my office. Still hadn’t heard from the doctor yet. I jump in the car from the Jimmy John’s parking lot, get on the busy road that takes me to the hospital, when the phone rings and our GP is calling me. What? No pen, no paper. Oh well. Bottom line was that he and the kidney doctor thought he had a type of kidney syndrome that effects your kidneys when you have liver disease. He hopes that the dialysis will “wake” up his kidneys so they can function on their own again. I asked the doctor if Tony is brought to a different part of the hospital for the dialysis, and he said “no, they do it right in his room.”
So I walk into his room and see this giant machine:
And a tech who has to be in the room the whole time. When I got there he had an hour and twenty minutes to go, and then it takes about another hour for her to break down the machine and clean it. So from beginning to end, this was about a six hour process. The shunt is on the side of his neck – two ports – one that takes the blood out, through the machine to clean it of impurities and then the second port to bring the clean blood back in.
The doctor warned me that Tony would be very tired afterwards, and he was absolutely right – you know I am the sleep whisperer when I am with Tony and I don’t mind a bit. He feels safe with me in the room and can fall asleep.
I am not sure he was all that thrilled to take a selfie with me though! And if you were wondering, yes, I totally need my bangs cut.
Tony ate some soup, crackers and jello and I ate 1/2 of my Jimmy John sandwich – only the best one – Vito with no tomato, or stinky onion put extra cherry peppers for the win.
I did manage to get all my steps in yesterday too:
I won’t have much more information for several days. He will continue to get dialysis every day for the next several days, and then the doctors will reevaluate the plan of attack. Your continued support, email asking how he’s doing, adding him to prayer chains – it is more appreciated than you’ll ever know.
And you’ll be very proud of me – I haven’t eaten a pizza by myself this whole week! I am an emotional eater and with no eyes watching me, I could do some serious damage. Just trying to take each day as it comes and making the best of it. Tony has had such a rough year this year – starting on January 1 of this year, I think he’s been hospitalized six times this year so far between home and Mayo. I just wish he could catch a break, ya know? I tell him all the time that I’d switch places with him in a heartbeat, but then he tells me he couldn’t live without me and that he could never be as strong as I am if the roles were reversed. I love him.
I’m just checking up on blogs after being gone for far too long. So sorry to hear what you guys are going through!
I’m always amazed at how well you keep things together and as normal as possible through the scary times. I would have eaten a whole friggin’ cake by now!
Hang in there.
As you can probably tell from my flurry of comments I am way behind in blog reading and ugh, I’m so so sorry to hear about Tony not doing well. I wish I could send my mom (she’s a nurse and does a lot of home care) to help take care of him!!
Oh Biz – I am so sorry to hear about Tony and this new health issue – I am sending you guys so many good thoughts that the dialysis works! It seems like you guys have a great medical team in your corner and both you and Tony seem to be keeping amazing attitudes through all of the setbacks – you guys are such a great example of a good couple that can roll with the punches and just keep smiling. Thinking of you guys!!!
I’m sending you guys love and prayers! I hope the docs are able to figure it out and get Tony well again!
Sending much love to you both! Hang in there Vat!!!!!
So sorry to hear about Tony. I have been reading your blog for years but have only commented once. I love your spunk! Tony is a lucky man to have you. You are strong and care so much about him!! Prayers to you both.
Tony’s so lucky to have you! He’s got doctors taking care of him, make sure you take care of YOU. Will be thinking of you both
My prayers go out tonight for you and Tony. Hope the kidneys wake up and he feels better soon. Sorry you have to go through this again. Hugs.
Oh Biz….sorry to hear about Tony. I kinda thought something was up when you hinted a few things about him. Just know you and Tony are in good hands. I am sure you have many people praying for you. Keep looking up…there is healing in the Cross of Jesus.
You are a strong and loving woman. The power of prayer is well documented. Look at all the people including me who are joining that ground swell. Hugs to you, darlin’. You are doing good!
Oh, my 🙁 My brother was on dialysis for a few days one time. It was scary for me, too! I remember well! Your “plate is full”, as we say in my family. You have so much going on…yet, you take the time to blog every.single.day. Thank you. Hang in there. I hope hubby is better soon. Very soon. XOXO
OMG Biz! I am sitting here, just home from the day at 630PM and now I am bawling my eyes out for you. I kind of figured Tony wasn’t feeling the greatest but I had no inkling that he was so sick. My thoughts and prayers are with you! PLEASE let any of us know if there’s anything we can do. I know it’s super hard to ask for help but if you need something don’t be ashamed to ask. If I wasn’t 7 hours away I’d do anything for you!
You are both in my prayers! Hugs,
Biz, So sorry to hear of Tony’s troubles. I’ve been reading your blog regularly for a long time now. I found you while searching out some inspiration on living with Type 1 diabetes, and am amazed by your positive attitude and drive. I’m also ashamed to say I don’t handle things with the grace that you do. You are an inspiration to me to be better.
Prayers and good wishes to both of you and hope Tony is feeling better soon.
I was wondering when this post would be coming. I’m so sorry friend. I’ve been praying for you both. You have an amazing outlook about this and you have lots of love being poured out on you both. xoxo
Biz, You and Tony are in my prayers…..stay strong.
Biz, best of thoughts to you and Jeff. I know you are strong, but we are all here for you when you need us.
Oh, Biz!! I’m so very sorry!! I feel so frustrated for y’all!!! I’m glad you made the decision on Monday to go to the hospital. I hope that the dialysis helps Tony feel much better very quickly!!!
Stay strong – cry when you need to, vent when you need to and take care of yourself!!!!
Hi Biz, so sorry to hear Tony’s not feeling well. Keeping your family in my prayers and thoughts. Stay tough! Hugs, Maria