The second person . . .

UPDATED:  My husband passed away in December 2014 after several years of illness, which included an aortic heart valve replacement, colon cancer and ultimately complications from congestive heart failure.  I miss him so much, but I think he would be so proud of how I am doing. ❤️

The second person to change my life is my husband Tony!   (Update: Here’s how much he loves me!)

We met on the internet almost 20 years ago.  I’ll never forget our first meeting!

We talked on the phone for hours for a few weeks after meeting online.  One of the best lines in his first email to me was that he was proud to be an Italian and that he had two separate eye brows and no back hair!  That made me laugh out loud!

I had already had plans to visit my brother in Iowa the weekend before our first date.  Before I left, I had my outfit laid out, Hannah was going to stay over at my mom’s house.  Everything was set! 

On our way to Iowa, Hannah has to go to the bathroom, and we stop at a truck stop.  About 50 miles later, I reach for my purse, only to realize that I left it in the bathroom stall at the truck stop!  I actually remembered the name of the truck stop, called and someone was kind enough to turn it in!  I asked if they would hold it for me on my trip back and they said no problem.   So I called Charlie to say that he’d have to pay my way that weekend!

So we are on our way home, and I have enough gas to get us to the truck stop that has my wallet.  All is well!  I was so excited.  Now, if you have read “the first person” page, you’ll know that I devoted the first 8 years of Hannah’s life to her, and I had not been on a date in over 8 years!   So needless to say, I was SO looking forward to meeting Tony!

So we get to the truck stop, I tell them who I am, and they say that my wallet is in the safe, and they don’t have the combination, and the person that does isn’t scheduled to work that day and doesn’t have a cell phone.  What?  Don’t you realize that I have a date tonight??!!   So Hannah and I go back to my sweet Ford Escort and I tell her, “look for change!”  I suddenly realize that I have no money, no gas to get home and 25o miles to go before I get to Tony.

Just then a women is getting in her car next to me and I say “I know this is going to sound weird, but I left my wallet here on Friday, didn’t realize it until I was 50 miles away, they are holding it for me, but no one has the key and I have to get to Chicago because I have a date tonight.  Can I borrow $20 for gas and I’ll take your name and address and mail you a check?”  I literally blurted this out in about 1 second!  She looks at me, looks at sweet Hannah in the car and doesn’t hesitate!  I cannot believe my luck!  I asked for her address and she said not to worry about it! 

So I get home and there is a message on my machine.  It’s my Mom, and she said that she has a business dinner to go to and can’t watch Hannah.  What?!  So as I jump in the shower I tell Hannah, call any of your friends and see if you can sleep over tonight!  I get out of the shower, Hannah is going to stay at Janie’s.  Whew!  Now I go down to the basement where my outfit is laid out.  Okay, so at the time my twin sister and I are living in a two flat that we own.  The previous owners had a huge cedar lined closet in the basement for his wife’s off-season wardrobe, so we just shared this closet and combined our clothes. 

So I go to “our” closet, and my outfit is gone.  Okay, you have to realize I am so low maintenance.  In high school, my sister would get up, change her outfit at least 10 times, curl her hair, etc.   Meanwhile, I wouldn’t get out of bed until I heard her boyfriend honk his horn to take us to school!  So for me to lay out an outfit in and of itself is amazing!

My sister was at work, and I said “what are you wearing?”  Oh, these cute capri black pants and pink top.  UUGGHH!  That was my outfit!  So I just threw on the nearest thing I saw. 

Okay, so Hannah’s taken care of, I have clothes on (not what I wanted!) no purse, and only two keys on my key ring – one to my car and one to the house.  And I walked (Tony picked a place right by my house!) to the restaurant and the closer I got, the faster I started walking!  When I told people all the obstacles of getting to this date, they said “didn’t those signs mean that you shouldn’t have gone on this date?”   Nope!  I just wanted to get there faster!

So when I put my ad online, the only picture I had was my church picture!  It was the only one I had just of me!  And I only knew how to add one picture at the time.  Tony, however, must have sent me 30 pictures of himself!  So I knew exactly what he looked like.  All I remember is that I walked in, saw him at the bar and immediately said to myself “He’s hot!” 

Tony’s recollection was that when I came in, the sun was coming in the window, so all he saw was the outline of my body and not my face yet.  He said he told the bartender our story that we were meeting for the first time and when the bartender saw me before Tony, he said “she’s really pretty!”

We had a wonderful dinner, we talked up a storm and it was as if we had known each other our whole lives!  And the thing is, without the internet, our paths would have never crossed in a million years!  We met on love@aol.com (or if Tony tells the story, we met at exoticdancers.com!) which was the precursor to match.com. 

So we each have a child.  Hannah is 8, his son Joe is 10.  We both say that let’s just take our time and introduce ourselves to each others kids after we’ve dated for a while.   Well, our date was on a Sunday night and we all got together that next weekend!  This is not to say that there not adjustments with the kids.  Hannah had only known her life with just me and her and I could tell Joe was a bit apprehensive too!

I think about four weeks after we started dating we “moved in” together.  During the week was spent at my house with Hannah.  Then we would get Joe every Friday for the weekend and spend the weekends at Tony’s house.   We married six months after we met in Naples, Florida.  Joe was the best man and Hannah was the maid of honor.  It was just Tony’s parents and my mom and it was perfect!   I was never a girl that dreamed of a big wedding!

So today is our 8th wedding anniversary (we were married just shy of 14 years before he passed away)   I wish it wasn’t going to be spent in a hospital with him having surgery, but I know everything will be okay.

I LOVE YOU TONY!  HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!

p.s.  February 2017 – I miss your face, you making me laugh.  Your son texted me today wishing he had paid more attention to your Vegas stories because he’s in Vegas right now and wished he could reach out to you and tell you where he is and where your favorite places to go were.  Don’t worry, I told him about THE Steakhouse in CircusCircus – which is still going strong.  Love you forever!

27 Comments
  1. mary @ what's cookin with mary
    August 31, 2012

    This is such a sweet story Biz!! Glad I finally read it. My husband and I met online (aol!) also.

  2. Gina Fit by 41 Maybe 42
    September 11, 2010

    Great story! We had a simple wedding, too, in AzSU’s Danforth Chapel. Took the bus there. Bought my flowers at the grocery store. Danny had black jeans and a white shirt with the sleeves rolled up. I had on a simple dress and boots. That was 15 years ago.

  3. Laura
    June 3, 2010

    That really is the sweetest story! My hubby and I met on-line as well. We’re coming up on our 2 year anniversary next month. He is so perfect for me.

    Have a great week!

  4. Sarah
    May 27, 2010

    My husband and I met on line as well!! I love following your blog and think that you and Tony have an amazing partnership and a beautiful/awesome family!

  5. Lisa
    April 22, 2010

    Ok…you’re apparently going to have a lot of comments from me on your blog today…lol.

    Another amazing love story!! So cool that you got married in Naples. I was born and raised in Ft. Myers….I live in north FL now.

  6. Carly
    April 15, 2010

    Happy Anniversary, you crazy kids 🙂
    What a sweet post – thanks for sharing Biz!

    • Arnaldo
      August 30, 2013

      A psychiatrist is a phcyisian who specializes in the diagnosis and treatment of mental disorders. I have a bachelor’s degree in the social services field. For several years, I have worked with children who have been diagnosed with mental disorders. It is upsetting to see children victimize at an early age and even more disturbing to see them as predators as early as 5 years of age, however knowing that I am doing my part to assist them in becoming functioning youths and adults is rewarding. The empathy, confidentiality and maturity of a medical assistant are definitely needed in this area. I enjoy establishing a rapport with these clients and helping them to find adequate coping skills to deal with their disorders, therefore I would like to work for a psychiatrist.I would not like to work for an emergency phcyisian for several reasons. I will explain a few. Patients who come to the emergency center typically have serious injuries or trauma. I would not like to have my mind constantly focused on who is coming thru the door and how sever the prognosis is. Knowing myself, I know that would be my focus and I would not be very productive. Also, in the emergency room the staff has to be prepared for anything, I would prefer an area that focuses on a particular specialty. Most importantly, I do not wish to see excessive amounts of blood loss on a regular basis. Actually, not even a minimal amount of blood loss on a regular basis. Giving my opinion and thoughts about this specialty, I would not be an effective employee.

  7. suzicate
    April 14, 2010

    Thanks for linking this in today’s post. Incredibly beautiful story!

  8. thehealthyjunky
    April 14, 2010

    Awww this is such a cute story! I loved you post so much today that I had to read how you meet your husband! Sounds like an amazing person!

  9. ingrid
    April 10, 2009

    Ha, Exoticdancers.com?! Sounds like something my honey would say. When he writes a check to me in the memo he would write the craziest things, exotic massage, hummer, etc. He’s a nut!

    Loved the story! Thanks again for sharing!
    ~ingrid

  10. Linda r
    March 26, 2009

    How many calories and carbs and fat would I need to eat daily to lose weight? I am not a diabetic but my husband is and I know how to do the carb thing but would like to watch and lose weight. I am 58 in May and am 5’9″ tall and weigh 264.8 pounds. I have done Weight Watchers and lost 100 pounds and kept it off for 5 years until I had an accident and got a brain injury and am now on meds. I felt sorry for me because I started to gain weight and have allowed myself to gain it all back! Can you help me? Thanks and I love your site and all the recipes.

  11. Daughter
    December 26, 2008

    Happy Anniversary you two 🙂

  12. Charlie Hills
    December 22, 2008

    Well, at least it all worked out in the end, Jennifer. I’m looking forward to the third, fourth, and fifth persons. I hope I’m in the top ten. But I’d probably settle for twelfth. It’s an honor just to be nominated.

  13. Jennifer
    December 22, 2008

    I don’t remember taking your outfit, sorry Biz!

    Happy Anniversary to you both 🙂

  14. Christina
    December 22, 2008

    I had a big smile the whole time I read this! It’s very similiar to Johnny and me! We met online through a message board for one of his websites (he’s a web developer), sent tons of emails back and forth, talked for hours on the phone, and then he flew to come see me for a week. When he left to go home, it was honestly the hardest thing I had to go through.

    BUT three weeks later he flew back to come help me pack up all my things and my 2 pets and I moved in with him!

    A lot of times when people hear that they think it’s crazy how fast it moved, but like your story – if it just “clicks” it makes sense to you two, and nobody could understand it unless they were in the same situation.

  15. Charlie Hills
    December 22, 2008

    The weird thing is: that’s exactly how I met Tony too.

  16. rainmaniam
    December 22, 2008

    Wonderful story Biz. I think Tony should feel prety lucky to have you too. Happy Anniversary

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