The second person . . .

UPDATED:  My husband passed away in December 2014 after several years of illness, which included an aortic heart valve replacement, colon cancer and ultimately complications from congestive heart failure.  I miss him so much, but I think he would be so proud of how I am doing. ❤️

The second person to change my life is my husband Tony!   (Update: Here’s how much he loves me!)

We met on the internet almost 20 years ago.  I’ll never forget our first meeting!

We talked on the phone for hours for a few weeks after meeting online.  One of the best lines in his first email to me was that he was proud to be an Italian and that he had two separate eye brows and no back hair!  That made me laugh out loud!

I had already had plans to visit my brother in Iowa the weekend before our first date.  Before I left, I had my outfit laid out, Hannah was going to stay over at my mom’s house.  Everything was set! 

On our way to Iowa, Hannah has to go to the bathroom, and we stop at a truck stop.  About 50 miles later, I reach for my purse, only to realize that I left it in the bathroom stall at the truck stop!  I actually remembered the name of the truck stop, called and someone was kind enough to turn it in!  I asked if they would hold it for me on my trip back and they said no problem.   So I called Charlie to say that he’d have to pay my way that weekend!

So we are on our way home, and I have enough gas to get us to the truck stop that has my wallet.  All is well!  I was so excited.  Now, if you have read “the first person” page, you’ll know that I devoted the first 8 years of Hannah’s life to her, and I had not been on a date in over 8 years!   So needless to say, I was SO looking forward to meeting Tony!

So we get to the truck stop, I tell them who I am, and they say that my wallet is in the safe, and they don’t have the combination, and the person that does isn’t scheduled to work that day and doesn’t have a cell phone.  What?  Don’t you realize that I have a date tonight??!!   So Hannah and I go back to my sweet Ford Escort and I tell her, “look for change!”  I suddenly realize that I have no money, no gas to get home and 25o miles to go before I get to Tony.

Just then a women is getting in her car next to me and I say “I know this is going to sound weird, but I left my wallet here on Friday, didn’t realize it until I was 50 miles away, they are holding it for me, but no one has the key and I have to get to Chicago because I have a date tonight.  Can I borrow $20 for gas and I’ll take your name and address and mail you a check?”  I literally blurted this out in about 1 second!  She looks at me, looks at sweet Hannah in the car and doesn’t hesitate!  I cannot believe my luck!  I asked for her address and she said not to worry about it! 

So I get home and there is a message on my machine.  It’s my Mom, and she said that she has a business dinner to go to and can’t watch Hannah.  What?!  So as I jump in the shower I tell Hannah, call any of your friends and see if you can sleep over tonight!  I get out of the shower, Hannah is going to stay at Janie’s.  Whew!  Now I go down to the basement where my outfit is laid out.  Okay, so at the time my twin sister and I are living in a two flat that we own.  The previous owners had a huge cedar lined closet in the basement for his wife’s off-season wardrobe, so we just shared this closet and combined our clothes. 

So I go to “our” closet, and my outfit is gone.  Okay, you have to realize I am so low maintenance.  In high school, my sister would get up, change her outfit at least 10 times, curl her hair, etc.   Meanwhile, I wouldn’t get out of bed until I heard her boyfriend honk his horn to take us to school!  So for me to lay out an outfit in and of itself is amazing!

My sister was at work, and I said “what are you wearing?”  Oh, these cute capri black pants and pink top.  UUGGHH!  That was my outfit!  So I just threw on the nearest thing I saw. 

Okay, so Hannah’s taken care of, I have clothes on (not what I wanted!) no purse, and only two keys on my key ring – one to my car and one to the house.  And I walked (Tony picked a place right by my house!) to the restaurant and the closer I got, the faster I started walking!  When I told people all the obstacles of getting to this date, they said “didn’t those signs mean that you shouldn’t have gone on this date?”   Nope!  I just wanted to get there faster!

So when I put my ad online, the only picture I had was my church picture!  It was the only one I had just of me!  And I only knew how to add one picture at the time.  Tony, however, must have sent me 30 pictures of himself!  So I knew exactly what he looked like.  All I remember is that I walked in, saw him at the bar and immediately said to myself “He’s hot!” 

Tony’s recollection was that when I came in, the sun was coming in the window, so all he saw was the outline of my body and not my face yet.  He said he told the bartender our story that we were meeting for the first time and when the bartender saw me before Tony, he said “she’s really pretty!”

We had a wonderful dinner, we talked up a storm and it was as if we had known each other our whole lives!  And the thing is, without the internet, our paths would have never crossed in a million years!  We met on love@aol.com (or if Tony tells the story, we met at exoticdancers.com!) which was the precursor to match.com. 

So we each have a child.  Hannah is 8, his son Joe is 10.  We both say that let’s just take our time and introduce ourselves to each others kids after we’ve dated for a while.   Well, our date was on a Sunday night and we all got together that next weekend!  This is not to say that there not adjustments with the kids.  Hannah had only known her life with just me and her and I could tell Joe was a bit apprehensive too!

I think about four weeks after we started dating we “moved in” together.  During the week was spent at my house with Hannah.  Then we would get Joe every Friday for the weekend and spend the weekends at Tony’s house.   We married six months after we met in Naples, Florida.  Joe was the best man and Hannah was the maid of honor.  It was just Tony’s parents and my mom and it was perfect!   I was never a girl that dreamed of a big wedding!

So today is our 8th wedding anniversary (we were married just shy of 14 years before he passed away)   I wish it wasn’t going to be spent in a hospital with him having surgery, but I know everything will be okay.

I LOVE YOU TONY!  HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!

p.s.  February 2017 – I miss your face, you making me laugh.  Your son texted me today wishing he had paid more attention to your Vegas stories because he’s in Vegas right now and wished he could reach out to you and tell you where he is and where your favorite places to go were.  Don’t worry, I told him about THE Steakhouse in CircusCircus – which is still going strong.  Love you forever!